


Tastes Like...

by Ghosttypes



Category: Dragon Ball
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Gen, Humor, Murder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-25
Updated: 2019-08-25
Packaged: 2020-09-26 07:13:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20385766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ghosttypes/pseuds/Ghosttypes
Summary: Vegeta invites Goku over for stew, absolutely nothing else happens; I swear. But read it to the very end.





	Tastes Like...

Tastes Like...

It was a new day, as Son Goku left the house to visit his...friend, Vegeta. This was a special day, Vegeta had called him last night, and told him he that he had a special surprise for him, that he wouldn't see coming. Of course, Vegeta being nice and doing something like this was surprising enough.

After a while of speedy flying, the strongest Saiyan arrived at his destination and let himself in through the front door. Hey, who needs manners?

Goku scratched at his scalp for a moment as he locked onto the Saiyan prince's energy signature. Just as he suspected, since his short rival wasn't in the gravity room training, he was in the kitchen. So he jogged down one of the long halls leading there.

"Wait? What am I doing?" Goku said after a little while of running, He pressed his index and middle fingers to his forehead, and used the instantaneous movement technique to teleport to the desired location.

"Kakarotto," Vegeta nodded as the taller Saiyan suddenly appeared in the kitchen, he then turned back around.

"Hey...Vegeta," Goku said slowly as he took in the scene before him. Vegeta was wearing a cooking apron, and was currently stirring a ladle in a large metallic pot with steam flowing out into the air around the troll haired Saiyan.

"What?" Vegeta scowled as he turned back around, and saw the disturbed look Goku was giving him, and started tapping his foot in irritation. But he didn't put his hand on his hip. For that, Goku was grateful.

"Uh...You said you had a surprise for me?" Goku grinned.

"I sure do," Vegeta responded with a...not scowl. A frown?

"Great! What is it!" Goku asked eagerly.

"I made you a special meal," Vegeta answered.

"But why? What's with your sudden change of heart towards me? Have you finally decided to admit that we're buddies?" Goku's smile widened.

"No," the response came almost before the question could fully form. "Just think of this as a... Thanks, for giving me a punching bag to help me become as strong as I am now, so quickly," Vegeta said slowly.

"No problem, pal," Goku smiled again. Not seeing the look on Vegeta's face, because of all the steam.

"So what's in the pot, anyway? It smells great," Goku drooled as he started to become hungry.

"... All you need to know for now, is that it's my special stew. With grade-A quality meat, that's very tender, because I personally pounded it to perfection," Vegeta smirked, and went back to preparing the stew.

A few minutes went by in silence as Goku twiddled his thumbs as he waited for his meal.

****

A few more minutes pass.

Still cooking.

****

An hour goes by.

****

Still cooking.

****

"Uh, did I drop by too early? I can go wait somewhere else," Goku scratched his head awkwardly.

"No, it's done now. You should have asked an hour ago," Vegeta snorted as he carried the pot to the kitchen table.

"Oh, heheheh... Can I eat it now?" Goku drooled some more.

"Dig in," Vegeta said as he sat down at the table, as Goku ran and grabbed a bowl. He didn't need a spoon though, that would only slow him down.

"Wow, this is awesome Vegeta!" Goku slurped as he gulped an entire bowl of the stew down eagerly, before just grabbing the whole huge pot and pouring as much as he could into his mouth.

"Glad to see you're enjoying it," Vegeta smirked.

"Say, now will you tell me what's in it?" Goku questioned before going back to pouring the stew down his gullet.

"Krillin," Vegeta said as he slurped down his own bowl's contents.

Goku slowed in his display of atrocious table manners, ever so slowly.

Not stopped, slowed.

"April Fools!" Vegeta shouted.

Goku stared long and hard at the spiky haired Saiyan, after putting the pot down finally.

"You murdered and cooked my oldest friend," Goku wasn't quite fully comprehending this at the moment.

"As an April Fools prank," Vegeta finished.

"...And fed him to me, as an April's Fools prank," Goku looked at the pot in amazement.

"Pretty much," the shorter Saiyan nodded.

"Why?" Goku asked, extraordinarily calm for someone who had been eating his friend.

"Well, I asked Baldy if he'd like to help me pull a prank on you for April Fools Day, he agreed. So I beat him to death, and cooked him," the short Saiyan shrugged.

"I really don't think he agreed to be killed," the taller man frowned.

"He should have known what he was getting into when he agreed," the other man snorted.

"But we just don't do this, Vegeta," Goku put his face in his hands.

"Isn't this what you people do on Earth though? The woman told me that you played practical jokes on one another on this day," Vegeta shrugged.

"... But we do not kill and eat our friends, Vegeta. That's not a joke, that's murder," Goku frowned.

"Oh, guess you don't want the rest then," Vegeta reached for the pot, but the taller Saiyan stopped him.

"I didn't say I wasn't going to finish," the strongest man on Earth said.

"What?" Vegeta raised a eyebrow. "I thought he was your best friend. Why would you willingly continue eating your best friend?"

"I'm a Saiyan. I always finish what I eat," Goku said seriously. Before lifting the pot to his mouth again.

Vegeta blinked.

****

"Krillin, you were a good friend. I mean a really good friend," Goku smiled and patted his stomach after finishing. Having kept to his word and finished the entire pot.

"I expected this to be funny, but now it's really just disturbing me," Vegeta stared, transfixed.

****

Later, Goku went to inform Eighteen and her daughter Marron of their unfortunate loss.

****

Notes: ... Yeah. 


End file.
